Unfortunately, it's too easy to blame the moms for neglecting their kids, allowing them to be exposed to violence, not keeping them clean enough. I have seen plenty of single moms here and they touch me deeply. They seem to know they are being watched and judged by the middle-class (white?) world. There is a vulnerability in their eyes, a wish to be liked that is as clear as the looks on some of the kids' faces. They have as much pride in their children as any other parent, obviously, and glow when told they have raised a polite, sweet, talented child. At HeadStart camp today, when I talked to Rebecca's mom about Rebecca's chipped tooth (a ball hit her in the face), the mom didn't blame us or get angry. She assured us it was alright and Rebecca really loved camp. All the little boys at camp said "thank you" when I gave them a napkin. Zoey, brimming with confidence, gave me a long list of the things she is good at: art, reading British authors, gymnastics, reading poetry, etc., etc. I asked her how she gets so good at so many things and she told me how she imagines that she is doing the thing very, very well, and then she imagines all the good things that might follow from that (a prize, a good grade, etc.). These kids were engaged and engaging, smart, active, resilient -- and how did they get that way? They were raised by single moms, women who try and try and try and so often succeed. Hurray for them.
marge
Thursday, June 23, 2011
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2 comments:
Marge,
What a great post. Thank you for sharing these insights on single moms and the wonderful work that they do.
Thanks to you for sharing these experiences with our kids and our greater community.
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